[It’s that they just don’t care.]

If you were at my home for dinner and you said you’d like a veggie burger, I would prepare it for you in the following manner:
1) microwave frozen veggie patty on microwave-safe plate
2) slap thawed veggie patty on cold bun fresh out of fridge
3) throw so-called veggie burger at your head to see if you caught it in your mouth
4) throw microwave-safe plate at your head for good measure

I would take such loving care in preparing your dinner because veggie burgers are silly; I do not believe in veggie burgers and thus would see no point in wasting any of my precious time trying to dress one of the hockey pucks up for you. It would be your worst fake-food dining experience ever, and I would blame you for being weird enough to ask me for a veggie burger in the first place. Do not come to me for a veggie burger. There are no veggie burgers in my house.

Similarly, I was disappointed but not in the least bit surprised when Republican pundits on the radio started saying over the last few days that if you’re dumb enough to want a national health care system, the horrific impact of government bureaucracy on health care as recently evidenced by the veterans’ hospitals ought to cure you of that delusion.

Well, yeah, if you’re dumb enough to put people who hate the very concept of government programs in charge of government programs, then I’d say you are pretty screwed. Why on earth should we expect the people who want to drown government in the bathtub to go about implementing national programs with flair and gusto, I mean, seriously? Rumsfeld’s Pentagon, former RNC Chairman James Nicholson’s VA, George Bush’s budget cuts and 12 years of GOP Congressional “oversight” — that’s a recipe for a delicious veggie burger if I ever heard one.

Duck!



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